Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Not Gonna Lie...

I am so discouraged lately by my injury. It has been 2 1/2 weeks since I busted up my Achilles and I am still limping bad and am still limited. It was gradually feeling better, then Sunday I was wrangling all of my kids at this family fun center Boomers and I tripped a little in the parking lot, unintentionally landing on my hurt foot. I reinjured it :(

So here I am today, feeling fat, tired, a little depressed and anxious. I am anxious because I am physically incapable of doing at least 75% of what I usually can do. Most of these things include normal daily maintenance and parenting. Thankfully my dear husband is home all week for the Thanksgiving holiday because so are my 3 busy boys.

I don't do well with slowing down. I don't do well with letting others help. And I don't do well with being the weak one of the litter. We've been furniture shopping and yesterday we had to go to Ikea. My husband wheeled me around in a wheelchair which was a humbling experience to say the least. The same day I can say that I did finally see a doctor again and a referral for an MRI is in the works, as well as to see an orthopedist and physical therapy.

Last night I took my oldest son to see Catching Fire, just him and I. It was a great movie! Part way through I was regretting not running more while I was healthy and feeling so jealous of Katniss running through those trees (we'll disregard for the sake of my post that she was running for her life...). I was wishing I could miraculously receive a silver parachute with a glorious canister attached that would contain some kind of cream or wrap that would cure my ailment.

Then today we took the boys to Balboa Park where they have Free Residents' Tuesdays which allows locals and military to get in free to select museums. Again, I was wheeled through the museum, and when I was not in a wheelchair I was using my crutches(which HURT!). I love going places, especially new places. But about halfway through our visit I realized I wasn't even enjoying much and I just wanted to go home, close all of the curtains and escape until I can walk normally again.

I guess I simply needed to write this post to express my frustration and sadness at finding myself so not me lately. Being hurt has worn me down.

In one month we will walk through the gates of one of my favorite places: Disneyland. We are taking the kids there for Christmas. I really don't want my husband to have to wheel me everywhere. I really don't want to rent a motorized cart. For 2014 I have set the goal of running 12 half marathons- one for every month. That feels extremely out of reach at this point. I will just be glad to walk again.

So that's where I am people! I will come around and have good days too. But if you read this will you do me a favor and say a prayer for me? Thanks :)

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Fat Day, Skinny Day

This title sounds like it could be the start to a bad book written in Dr. Seuss language! However, the thoughts behind it are very real (and probably won't rhyme).

Seeing the numbers on the scale jump a bit higher last week did a number on me. The weird thing is that I always say I don't depend solely on weight measurement but no matter how I try to reason with myself, that number matters to me. It is one huge way I gauge how I am doing with health and fitness. It stinks to be on the "heavier" side of it.

But then I had this beautiful sunny and warm day last week where I wore just the right pants, and my hair looked great! So I've gained a couple of pounds, so what? I felt beautiful aside from the fact.

Fast forward to today...I have been in the stretch pants I slept in last night all day. I woke up and did the normal thing, but ended up doing chores and the tedious job of vacuuming out my car. It took so long it ran right into my kids' pick-up time from school so here I am, still in my stretch pants, unshowered, 3rd-day-hair pulled up, no makeup. I care, I really do...just not enough today I guess.

Then I made the "mistake" of going to Sports Authority to shop for bathing suits. I did end up finding a great place to swim laps, which also happens to have boot camp classes that incorporate the pool. The lady at the front counter told me that they have bikes as well. But in order to swim there for fitness, I needed more than a beach bikini.

So I went to Sports Authority...I tried on bathing suits...I faced the music! The lighting was terrible and the large bottoms were tight! In my defense, I wear a misses large normally. I have a booty and I'm fine with that. But having them be way too small? This can't be happening! I couldn't have possibly gained all 7 pounds in my butt alone. Sulking, I took the bottoms back to the clearance rack to see if they had *gulp* larger sizes. Then I looked closer at the tags...they were little girls' sizes! THANK GOD IN HEAVEN! So instead of thinking a ladies large was too small, it turned out the girls' XL fit great! Bonus...I still fit into some sort of little girls' sizes. For whatever that helps, it helped.

So while I had made a mistake and felt better about it, I did notice that things are not looking as in-shape as they did earlier this summer. The sleekness of areas that have been sleek are less sleek. My tan has faded and that usually helps mask a lot too, so I realize that. But it's good, I'm glad to see where I'm at...because tomorrow I start swimming. I hate swimming, I suck at swimming, this ought to be good for me :)

Monday, November 18, 2013

Razzleberry Smoothie

Razzleberry Smoothie

TJ’s Vanilla Cultured Coconut Milk
TJ’s Organic FF Milk

This smoothie is bursting with raspberry flavor, which I love. You can add gobs and gobs of kale and you won’t overpower the yummy raspberry flavor.

Raspberries are high in fiber, vitamin C, and powerful antioxidants. They are linked to improved cardiovascular and neurological health as well as cancer prevention. (See livestrong.com or driscolls.com for more nutrition info)

Achilles Injury: One Week Out

It has now been one week since my injury. How's it going?

Well I am slowly regaining range of motion and strength. Today was the first day I could push down on my clutch with my forefoot instead of my heel. It is still very hard though! Stretching my Achilles is possible, but super tight and painful. I try to do it throughout the day anyway. If the Achilles is like a rubberband, I don't want it healing and ending up shorter! I'm not sure if that would realistically happen but in my mind stretching it helps. I am getting around ok, but with quite the limp. I am basically walking on my heel on my left (injured) side still. I try to ice it once or twice a day.

Outside of the actual injury, I'm kind of going nuts not being able to exercise. You'd think I might be happy to have a genuine excuse to "get out of" exercising, but I am not! Exercise is a huge, regular part of my life and I have to admit I have been snapping at family members (with a prompt apology) for stupid things...things that usually don't get to me.

So my goal today is to 1) See about swimming laps on base. I'm nervous about this because I haven't been to this lap pool and a huge majority of the patrons are Marines. This one is going to take some courage! 2) Get a PCM and the earliest possible appointment with the hope that I can get the ball rolling on a referral to physical therapy.

1/9/14: FYI while the Achilles is a tendon like I mentioned, the stretching I was doing probably wasn't helping. A torn achilles needs to be immobilized kind of with the toe pointed, and the tendon shortened. Once it is healed, physical therapy helps to gradually stretch it back out. Did I injure myself by stretching? Does it matter? I will never know! But overall, if this ever happens to you, immobilize that puppy and get to your PCM pronto! It is important to see the extent of the damage early on so intervention can be taken quickly. In my case I have developed scar tissue because my injury is so old. My surgery will probably be more extensive and will require a longer rehab period. 

Monday, November 11, 2013

Achilles' Tendon...turns out it's pretty important!

So the flag football tournament came and went. Our team placed 3rd! I was so hyped for this tournament...I mean I was ready to blow it up! Well, first play of the first game, the handoff was made to me and at some point while busting through ladies, I took a blow to my left Achilles' tendon and down to the ground I went. I didn't play at all after that. Instead, I went to urgent care with a left lower leg that simply wasn't working. Turns out (this is sarcasm here...) your Achilles' tendon is integral in the function of your calf muscle. Injure your Achilles' and in addition to the pain you will experience, you will also experience the strange sensation of a muscle that just doesn't work. I tried to walk it off, and simply fell because my leg wasn't working, kind of like everything from the knee down was numb.

So here I am 3 days post injury. I am slowly regaining range-of-motion and function to my calf, but slowly. My left leg is a major cankle still with a lot of swelling. But I am seeing some-albeit minute-improvements each day. I am just thankful that it is just a contusion and not a tear-or worse-rupture, which would require surgery and months of recovery time. I'm not sure how long I will be down, but I'll just be thankful to walk normally again, whenever that happens.

So in the meantime my posts will probably be about recovery from time to time. I am also hoping to focus on nutrition and diet control.

Ever since moving to San Diego, we have been eating out a lot more, mostly for convenience. I have also been kind of eating whatever I feel like with just a little bit of thought to the calories that might be adding up. The good thing is that the entire first 90% of our time here I have had to be "bikini ready" and that really helps you keep yourself in check. But now that it is fall and the water parks are closed, and the weather isn't hot, it is easy to settle on jeans and a tank or shorts and a sweatshirt for beach attire.

That being said, I want to do better. If I had a scale, I would assume I may have gained 5 pounds since moving here. If not, I would be pleasantly surprised and could start ahead of the game. But either way (and since I don't have a scale) I want to make some positive steps back to healthier eating.

So here are a few goals:

Cook more, eat out less (measurable goal...no more than one meal out a week)
Practice portion control (use smaller bowls and plates)
Drink more water! (64 oz or more per day)
Eat more vegetables (do not buy snack foods such as chips and cheddar cheese crackers, snack on carrots, celery and sow peas instead)

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Squeezing one in!

I got a run done yesterday but didn't quite get to post it! Life is busy and sometimes all I have time for is the run, and not the blog post! So I'm getting it posted in the 5 minutes I have left before I need to wake my kiddos up for school.

Style/Workout: Get Out and Go Run (No Time or Distance Goal)
Setting/Route: Out my front door
Progress: (running mileage):  4 today/ 4 this month/ 378.2 year-to-date
This run felt tough. I did what I always do and it just felt tough. I walked some. I added mileage before tackling the big hill and it ended up being exactly 4 miles. 
I don't know what it is...if it is the fact that I'm only running 2-3 times a week or what, but I feel like I am just not getting better (and by better I mean faster) lately. I have still been biking with the husband once a week and have been playing football 3 times a week (that's over after our big tournament this weekend). I still kind of hover in the 9:45 minute mile pace for the most part. On good days I do get faster though. I guess today was just a tough one. 
I am itching for another half marathon. The one I wanted to run is coming up, but too soon since I haven't had any quality long runs in quite a while. I don't think it would be wise to try and just wing it. 
Good on me though...I registered for a 5K Turkey Trot yesterday! Nothing like a free race to force you to throw out all excuses!